What happened Since I Returned Home

After returning to the US, I went immediately to work as a trainer in Ft Lewis Washington. I loved that job. I was able to contribute my experiences, I learned new skills, I perfected my ability to train soldiers. I had great leadership and guidance. I was very committed to doing my job.

Physically I was in pain. The pain never stopped. I went to physical therapy, nothing worked. I had to give in to medication. I did my job without complaint. I went to see doctor's in my off time. It was so important to me that I reamin physically fit and able to do my job.

The doc told me I was not getting any better. I didn't want to hear that. I wanted to hear I was getting better. But that was not the case. I pushed through the pain and struggled every day to do my job. Even with the physical pain I never let it get me down. There were some long days, some very cold days, some very hot days. At the end of the day I was shredded.

I would go back to my room, medicate and sleep. I was in so much pain I couldn't sleep, I couldn't eat, I was barely able to drive myself to work. My doc increased the pain medication, increased the number of medications until we found a combination that worked. I was able to sleep.  That helped a lot.

On some of the days during the driver's training MODs we would work from 6 am. until 2300. Three days back to back. We would be seated in an HUMVEE driving in a serial. We trained over 4,000 drivers in this manner for 2009-2010. It was a very demanding time. We covered every inch of the HUMVEE.

We trained in off road, we trained in garrison, we trained in roll overs, we trained in mechanics. Everything. It was grueling. At the end of these modules I was barely able to move. I had a pronounced limp in my right leg asnd muscle spasms that debilitated me. I never complained. I pushed through it.

My days off were spent in recovery. I felt best when I was lying prone, not moving, not standing, not walking. I was really content to be able to train the deploying soldiers and  to be part of the team. I knew that it was just a matter of time before I couldn't do it any more.